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Bats announce plans to fuck shit up during eclipse (humor article)
OTTAWA – With Monday afternoon’s eclipse expected to occur mid-afternoon, bats from across the continent have announced that they will “fucking just go bananas” during the fleeting moments of darkness. “For too long, the only thing protecting humankind from our leathery-winged wrath has been the protection you all enjoy from the cruel sun,” explained Vlad, a long-eared myotis bat and chairman of the North American Association for Bat Supremacy.
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